søndag, maj 24, 2009
Salzburg
I disse dage er jeg og min kollega Kristina paa ferie i Östrig hos gode venner og kolleger, Silvia og Brigitte. Det er helt fantastisk at faa slappet lidt af, nyde dette smukke land og i det hele taget bare väre sammen med disse fantastiske mennesker og blive forkälet. Igaar tog vi til den smukke Salzburg og nöd en skön dag i Mozarts födeby. Tak Silvia og Brigitte for al jeres omsorg.
(Paa billedet herunder ser i Kristina, Eva (kollega til B og S), Silvia, mig og Brigitte.)
At the moment Kristina (a colleague) and I are enjoying a week of holiday in Austria together with some colleagues and friends from Austria, Brigitte and Silvia. It is sooo wonderful to relax a bit, enjoy the beautiful scenery, getting spoiled and just to be together with these fantastic people. Yesterday we went to Salzburg and enjoyed a day in the birthtown of Mozart. Thank you Silvia and Brigitte for all your care for us!
(On the picture above you see Kristina, Eva (a colleague of B and S), Silvia, me and Brigitte.)
søndag, maj 10, 2009
Bøger på dit natbord – Books on your bedside table
Nogle gange bringer dameblade eller aviser artikler, hvor de stiller kendte mennesker spørgsmålet: ”Hvilke bøger ligger for øjeblikket på dit natbord?”
I morges da jeg lå og vågnede, slog tanken mig: ”Øv, hvorfor er det kun de kendte, der får lov at svare på det spørgsmål??” Men så kom jeg i tanke om min blog. Her har jeg fuldstændig kontrol over indholdet, og den mulighed kan man jo totalt bruge og misbruge som man vil, så her kommer den altså: Hvilke bøger ligger på mit natbord for øjeblikket?
Bibelen – en god gammel favorit skrevet af min yndlingsforfatter og bedste ven. Kan helt klart anbefales både i livets gode og dårlige stunder! Bare et par vers – og din dag kan ændre sig totalt. Mit eksemplar faldt fra hinanden forleden og er nu tapet sammen med sort elektrikertape (tænkte at jeg kunne score et par point på hellighedsbarometeret ved at nævne det…)
An introduction to the New Testament – Sådan er det at være stræber. Dette er en af bøgerne på mit Masterstudie for tiden og er på en eller anden måde endt på mit natbord, så jeg hurtigt kan række ud efter den, når trangen til at vide mere om Paulus slår mig.
Superfood – Namen, her er altså en bog, du må anskaffe dig, hvis du gerne vil lære at leve sundt på en lækker og let måde – og helt i overensstemmelse med den nyeste forskning. Skrevet af svensk læge og meget letlæst.
Løb dig slank – Fik bogen forærende og gik med begejstring i gang med at læse den. Desværre fandt jeg ud af, at jeg åbenbart løber helt forkert (intensitet, længde osv.) og har ikke været ude at løbe siden… Er nemlig ikke nået til kapitlet om, hvordan jeg skal løbe rigtigt endnu.
A girl’s best friend – Elsker ironiske tøsebøger og her endda en kristen en af slagsen. Er glad for at jeg ikke er den eneste ironiske kristne, der findes (udover dig, Kathrine!) Helt sikkert en god modvægt til alle de andre bøger på natbordet (eksklusiv Bibelen, som også kan ironisere en smule her og der).
Og under bøgerne – ligger to blade: Alt for Damerne, en kær veninde i en hård tid og så Danmarksposten, som holder os udenlandskdanskere opdateret med, hvad I går og tænker og laver i Danmark, så vi ikke er helt ved siden af, når vi kommer hjem (hvilket i mit tilfælde er om 113 dage).
Sometimes women's magazines or newspapers bring articles where famous people are asked the question, "What books are currently on your bedside table?"
This morning when I was waking up, I thought to myself: "Why is it only the famous who are allowed to answer this question in public?" But then I remembered my blog. Here I have complete control over the content and the possibility to do what I like for better or worse, so here it is: What books are on my bedside table at the moment?
The Bible - a good old favorite written by my favorite author and best friend. I can highly recommend this book for all of life’s crazy moments! Just a few verses - and the direction of your day can be turned upside down. The other week my copy fell apart but is now taped together again with black tape. (Just thought I could score a few holy points by mentioning it…)
An introduction to the New Testament - This is one of the books that I presently read for my Master studies and in one way or another ended up on my bedside table, so that I can quickly reach out for it when the urge to know more about Paul strikes me.
Superfood – A Danish/Swedish book but it is a really a good one about how to live healthy in a delicious and easy way - and entirely consistent with the latest research.
Run and get slim – Also Danish. It was a present and I enthusiastically started to read it. Unfortunately I discovered that I seem to have a completely wrong running style (intensity, length, etc.) and have not been out running since ... have not reached the chapter on how I will run properly yet.
A girl's best friend – I just love chick-lit books with irony and here is even a Christian one. Am glad to discover that I am not the only Christian who seem to notice the irony in everything. Definitely a good counterbalance to all the other books on the bedside table (excluding the Bible, which can also have a slightly ironic tone here and there).
And underneath the books – I have two magazines: My favourite Danish women’s magazine, which has become a dear friend in a tough time and then a magazine for Danes abroad to keep us updated with the latest trends and thoughts in Denmark so that we will not be totally out of place when we return (in my case, still 113 days to go).
fredag, maj 08, 2009
En tid som denne – For such a time as this
I de sidste par måneder har jeg mærket Guds kærlighed på en dybere måde end nogensinde før. I forhold til min situation i Schweiz følte jeg mig virkelig presset ind i et hjørne. Jeg anede simpelthen ikke, hvad jeg skulle gøre. Men gang på gang viste Gud mig, at jeg var allervigtigst for ham. Ikke hvad jeg gjorde eller ikke gjorde. Bare hvem jeg er i hans øjne. Første gang, var da jeg som beskrevet i en tidligere blogpost, sagde til ham, at jeg ikke havde tid til at deale med min smerte, fordi jeg skulle lede et vigtigt kursus, og Gud prompte svarede, at jeg også var vigtig. (Og der blev faktisk tid til både kursus og mig…)
Men også senere, da jeg begyndte at forstå, at det ikke er alle ofre, Gud ønsker af os. Han ønsker rent faktisk, at vi skal leve i overensstemmelse med vores personlighed. Der er altid undtagelser for denne regel, som beskrevet i sidste blogpost, men jeg har bare virkelig mærket hans omsorg for MIG – som den, han har skabt mig til at være - i hele dette forløb.
Efter, at beslutning var taget, har jeg endnu engang oplevet hans omsorg for mig. De sidste par år, har folk nemlig gang på gang citeret et vers fra Esthers bog, når de omtalte mit job her på Kilchzimmer. Genfortalt siger det: ”Hvem ved, måske var det med henblik på en tid som denne, at du fik dette job” (Ester 4,14). Mange gange har folk brugt dette vers til at sige til mig: ”Du er lige præcis rette person på rette post på rette tid.” Og det har jeg også selv følt. Og nu skal jeg så væk herfra – hvad blev der lige af at være rette person på rette sted på rette tid? Lige præcis dette vers fra Esters bog har naget mig en smule efter, at beslutningen var taget. Men flere gange i de sidste dage, er der kommet nogle forbi mig og har sagt: ”Selv om du kun har været her i kort tid, så har du været her på rette tid og sted.” Og så har de citeret lige præcis dette vers fra Esters bog.
OK, dét kalder jeg Guds omsorg for lige præcis mig!
In the past few months, I have experienced God's love in a deeper way than ever before. In regards to my situation in Switzerland I felt really pushed into a corner. I simply did not know what I should do. But time and time again God showed me that I was so important to him. Not what I did or did not do for him. Just because of who I am in his eyes. The first time was - as described in a previous blog post – when I told him that I did not have time to deal with my pain, because I was organising an important course, and God promptly replied that I was important too. (And as it turned out there was actually time for both the course and for me...)
But also later when I began to understand that it is not all sacrifices that God wants from us. He actually prefers that we live according to our personality. There are always exceptions to this rule, as described in the last blog post, but I just really experienced his caring for me throughout this process. How he actually wanted me to life according to the personality he has created me with.
After the decision was taken, I have once again seen his love for me. The last few years, people repeatedly cited a verse from Esther's book when they mentioned my job here at Kilchzimmer. They said, “It was for a time as this that you got this job" (Ester 4:14). They used this verse to say, "You are the exactly right person at the right position at the right time." And I had the same feeling myself. And now I am leaving - what about being the right person at the right place at the right time? This exact verse from Ester has nagged me a little after the decision was taken. But several times in the last couple of days people have come to me, cited the verse from Ester again and said, "Even if you've only been here a short time, you have been the right person at the right time and place."
That’s what I call God's care for me!
Men også senere, da jeg begyndte at forstå, at det ikke er alle ofre, Gud ønsker af os. Han ønsker rent faktisk, at vi skal leve i overensstemmelse med vores personlighed. Der er altid undtagelser for denne regel, som beskrevet i sidste blogpost, men jeg har bare virkelig mærket hans omsorg for MIG – som den, han har skabt mig til at være - i hele dette forløb.
Efter, at beslutning var taget, har jeg endnu engang oplevet hans omsorg for mig. De sidste par år, har folk nemlig gang på gang citeret et vers fra Esthers bog, når de omtalte mit job her på Kilchzimmer. Genfortalt siger det: ”Hvem ved, måske var det med henblik på en tid som denne, at du fik dette job” (Ester 4,14). Mange gange har folk brugt dette vers til at sige til mig: ”Du er lige præcis rette person på rette post på rette tid.” Og det har jeg også selv følt. Og nu skal jeg så væk herfra – hvad blev der lige af at være rette person på rette sted på rette tid? Lige præcis dette vers fra Esters bog har naget mig en smule efter, at beslutningen var taget. Men flere gange i de sidste dage, er der kommet nogle forbi mig og har sagt: ”Selv om du kun har været her i kort tid, så har du været her på rette tid og sted.” Og så har de citeret lige præcis dette vers fra Esters bog.
OK, dét kalder jeg Guds omsorg for lige præcis mig!
In the past few months, I have experienced God's love in a deeper way than ever before. In regards to my situation in Switzerland I felt really pushed into a corner. I simply did not know what I should do. But time and time again God showed me that I was so important to him. Not what I did or did not do for him. Just because of who I am in his eyes. The first time was - as described in a previous blog post – when I told him that I did not have time to deal with my pain, because I was organising an important course, and God promptly replied that I was important too. (And as it turned out there was actually time for both the course and for me...)
But also later when I began to understand that it is not all sacrifices that God wants from us. He actually prefers that we live according to our personality. There are always exceptions to this rule, as described in the last blog post, but I just really experienced his caring for me throughout this process. How he actually wanted me to life according to the personality he has created me with.
After the decision was taken, I have once again seen his love for me. The last few years, people repeatedly cited a verse from Esther's book when they mentioned my job here at Kilchzimmer. They said, “It was for a time as this that you got this job" (Ester 4:14). They used this verse to say, "You are the exactly right person at the right position at the right time." And I had the same feeling myself. And now I am leaving - what about being the right person at the right place at the right time? This exact verse from Ester has nagged me a little after the decision was taken. But several times in the last couple of days people have come to me, cited the verse from Ester again and said, "Even if you've only been here a short time, you have been the right person at the right time and place."
That’s what I call God's care for me!
Ofre - Sacrifices
Da jeg gik på lærerseminariet, fortalte vores dansklærer os, at hun var blevet redaktør på en bog med noveller om mod. Hun ville gerne have en historie med fra Bibelen og valgte (så vidt jeg husker) historien om David og Goliat. Da forlæggeren så hendes valg, bad han hende om at ændre historien til den om Abraham, der ofrer sin søn Isak. Min dansklærer havde meget svært ved at se, hvad denne historie havde med mod at gøre men endte med at proppe historien ind i novellesamlingen alligevel. Og jeg har en gang imellem i årene, der er gået, gjort mig de samme tanker. Hvad i al videste verden har denne historie at gøre med mod? Jeg tror egentlig, at det først er for nylig, at jeg har forstået det for alvor. Men det er en speciel slags mod, denne historie handler om, som jeg vil kalde tros-mod.
Sagen var den, at Gud havde lovet Abraham, at han ville blive til et stort folk – gennem sin søn Isak. Ikke gennem sin anden søn. Så da Gud beder Abraham om at ofre sin søn, så gør Abraham det vel vidende, at Gud må have en plan. Han ved, at dette ikke bliver Isaks endeligt, og derfor tør han at handle i tro og ofre det, Gud beder ham om. Og da Gud ser Abrahams tro(s-mod), stopper han hele seancen. Nu er dette selvfølgelig ikke en historie, vi kan overføre direkte til i dag, men selveste princippet bag den kan vi bruge. JEG kan i hvert fald.
Det har været en lang proces at bestemme sig for at flytte fra Schweiz. Det har været den sværeste beslutning i mit liv. Og i lang tid gik jeg rundt og sagde til Gud: ”Du ved, at jeg vil gøre alt for dig. Jeg vil gerne ofre mig for denne sag. Jeg vil gerne blive her for dig. For du har gjort så meget for mig.” Sagen var bare den, at Gud ikke ønskede dette offer af mig. Det var ikke et særlig brugbart offer, for der var faktorer, der gjorde, at jeg ikke kunne trives her og dermed ikke gøre mit bedste for ham.
Andre gange i mit liv har det været lige modsat. Jeg har ofret ting, som i andres øjne har set helt mærkeligt ud. Jeg har hørt sætninger såsom: ”Du kan da ikke ofre dette. Du har din egen lykke at tænke på.” Men i alle de tidligere tilfælde, vidste jeg fra dybet af mit hjerte, at det var ofre, Gud ønskede af mig, og det førte altid velsignelse med sig på længere sigt at bringe disse ofre. Og når jeg tænker tilbage på disse episoder, så er det med glæde. Der var tros-mod. Denne gang handlede tros-modet om at gøre det stik modsatte af, hvad alle forventede af mig.
Jeg kender en anden kvinde, som har været i præcis samme situation, som jeg har været igennem i denne proces. På alle planer (også alle dem, man ikke kan skrive om på sin blog eller nogen andre steder.) Hun bad også til Gud, og Gud gav hende tros-mod. På trods af, at alt var så svært for hende, vidste hun, at hun skulle blive der, hvor hun var. Og Gud har velsignet hende for det. To ens historier. Samme Gud. To helt forskellige løsninger. Han er fantastisk, er han ikk?
Jeg tror, at det, jeg forsøger at sige er: Det er ikke alle ofre, Gud er interesserede i, men dem, han er interesserede i, dem må vi give! De giver altid bonus i sidste ende. De er altid mulige. Men de ofre, han ikke ønsker – lad os da for Guds skyld – og for vores egen – lade være med give ham dem.
When I studied at Teacher’s College, our literature professor told us that she had been the editor of a book of short stories about courage. She wanted to have a story from the Bible in there as well and selected (as I recall) the story of David and Goliath. When the publisher saw here choice, he asked her to change it into the story of Abraham sacrificing his son, Isac. My professor had a hard time understanding what this story had to do with courage but put the story in the book anyway. And since then I have occasionally in the years gone by, been thinking about this too. What on earth does this story have to do with courage? It was only recently that I understood. But the story is about a special kind of courage that I would call faith-courage.
The matter of the fact is that God had promised Abraham that a great people would descent from him - through his son Isac. Not through his other son. So when God asks Abraham to sacrifice his son, Abraham knows that God must have a plan. He knows that this is not the end of Isac, and therefore he dares to act in faith and sacrifice what God has asked him about. And when God sees Abraham faith(-courage) he stops the whole act. Now this is obviously not a story, we can transfer directly to today, but the very principle behind it, we can use. I can anyway.
It's been a long process to decide to move from Switzerland. It has been the hardest decision of my life so far. And for a long time I walked around and said to God, "You know I will do anything for you. I will sacrifice anything you ask of me. I want to be here for you. For you have done so much for me." However, the thing was that God did not want that sacrifice of me. It was not a particularly useful sacrifice because there were factors that prevented me from thriving here and therefore I could not do my best for him.
Other times in my life it has been the other way around. I have sacrificed things which in the eyes of others have looked quite strange. I have heard phrases like, "You can not sacrifice this. You have your own happiness to think about." But in all previous cases, I knew from the bottom of my heart that this was a sacrifice God wanted of me and it always gave me great blessings long term to bring these sacrifices. And when I think back on these episodes, it is with joy. There was faith-courage. This time the faith-courage was to do the opposite of what everyone expected of me.
I know another woman who has been in exactly the same situation that I have been through in this process. At all levels (including all those whom I can not write about on this blog or anywhere else.) She also talked to God about the matter, and God gave her faith and courage. Despite the fact that everything was so hard for her, she knew that she had to stay put, where she was. And God has blessed her for it. Two similar stories. One God. Two different results. - He is amazing, isn't he!
I think that what I am trying to say is: It is not all sacrifices, God is interested in, but those he is interested in those we must give! They always have a blessing for us in the end. They are always possible. But the sacrifices he does not want - let us not give those to him.
Sagen var den, at Gud havde lovet Abraham, at han ville blive til et stort folk – gennem sin søn Isak. Ikke gennem sin anden søn. Så da Gud beder Abraham om at ofre sin søn, så gør Abraham det vel vidende, at Gud må have en plan. Han ved, at dette ikke bliver Isaks endeligt, og derfor tør han at handle i tro og ofre det, Gud beder ham om. Og da Gud ser Abrahams tro(s-mod), stopper han hele seancen. Nu er dette selvfølgelig ikke en historie, vi kan overføre direkte til i dag, men selveste princippet bag den kan vi bruge. JEG kan i hvert fald.
Det har været en lang proces at bestemme sig for at flytte fra Schweiz. Det har været den sværeste beslutning i mit liv. Og i lang tid gik jeg rundt og sagde til Gud: ”Du ved, at jeg vil gøre alt for dig. Jeg vil gerne ofre mig for denne sag. Jeg vil gerne blive her for dig. For du har gjort så meget for mig.” Sagen var bare den, at Gud ikke ønskede dette offer af mig. Det var ikke et særlig brugbart offer, for der var faktorer, der gjorde, at jeg ikke kunne trives her og dermed ikke gøre mit bedste for ham.
Andre gange i mit liv har det været lige modsat. Jeg har ofret ting, som i andres øjne har set helt mærkeligt ud. Jeg har hørt sætninger såsom: ”Du kan da ikke ofre dette. Du har din egen lykke at tænke på.” Men i alle de tidligere tilfælde, vidste jeg fra dybet af mit hjerte, at det var ofre, Gud ønskede af mig, og det førte altid velsignelse med sig på længere sigt at bringe disse ofre. Og når jeg tænker tilbage på disse episoder, så er det med glæde. Der var tros-mod. Denne gang handlede tros-modet om at gøre det stik modsatte af, hvad alle forventede af mig.
Jeg kender en anden kvinde, som har været i præcis samme situation, som jeg har været igennem i denne proces. På alle planer (også alle dem, man ikke kan skrive om på sin blog eller nogen andre steder.) Hun bad også til Gud, og Gud gav hende tros-mod. På trods af, at alt var så svært for hende, vidste hun, at hun skulle blive der, hvor hun var. Og Gud har velsignet hende for det. To ens historier. Samme Gud. To helt forskellige løsninger. Han er fantastisk, er han ikk?
Jeg tror, at det, jeg forsøger at sige er: Det er ikke alle ofre, Gud er interesserede i, men dem, han er interesserede i, dem må vi give! De giver altid bonus i sidste ende. De er altid mulige. Men de ofre, han ikke ønsker – lad os da for Guds skyld – og for vores egen – lade være med give ham dem.
When I studied at Teacher’s College, our literature professor told us that she had been the editor of a book of short stories about courage. She wanted to have a story from the Bible in there as well and selected (as I recall) the story of David and Goliath. When the publisher saw here choice, he asked her to change it into the story of Abraham sacrificing his son, Isac. My professor had a hard time understanding what this story had to do with courage but put the story in the book anyway. And since then I have occasionally in the years gone by, been thinking about this too. What on earth does this story have to do with courage? It was only recently that I understood. But the story is about a special kind of courage that I would call faith-courage.
The matter of the fact is that God had promised Abraham that a great people would descent from him - through his son Isac. Not through his other son. So when God asks Abraham to sacrifice his son, Abraham knows that God must have a plan. He knows that this is not the end of Isac, and therefore he dares to act in faith and sacrifice what God has asked him about. And when God sees Abraham faith(-courage) he stops the whole act. Now this is obviously not a story, we can transfer directly to today, but the very principle behind it, we can use. I can anyway.
It's been a long process to decide to move from Switzerland. It has been the hardest decision of my life so far. And for a long time I walked around and said to God, "You know I will do anything for you. I will sacrifice anything you ask of me. I want to be here for you. For you have done so much for me." However, the thing was that God did not want that sacrifice of me. It was not a particularly useful sacrifice because there were factors that prevented me from thriving here and therefore I could not do my best for him.
Other times in my life it has been the other way around. I have sacrificed things which in the eyes of others have looked quite strange. I have heard phrases like, "You can not sacrifice this. You have your own happiness to think about." But in all previous cases, I knew from the bottom of my heart that this was a sacrifice God wanted of me and it always gave me great blessings long term to bring these sacrifices. And when I think back on these episodes, it is with joy. There was faith-courage. This time the faith-courage was to do the opposite of what everyone expected of me.
I know another woman who has been in exactly the same situation that I have been through in this process. At all levels (including all those whom I can not write about on this blog or anywhere else.) She also talked to God about the matter, and God gave her faith and courage. Despite the fact that everything was so hard for her, she knew that she had to stay put, where she was. And God has blessed her for it. Two similar stories. One God. Two different results. - He is amazing, isn't he!
I think that what I am trying to say is: It is not all sacrifices, God is interested in, but those he is interested in those we must give! They always have a blessing for us in the end. They are always possible. But the sacrifices he does not want - let us not give those to him.
torsdag, maj 07, 2009
Tilbage til Danmark - Returning to Denmark
Denne blogpost kommer nok lidt som en overraskelse for de fleste, men jeg har valgt at sige mit job op i Schweiz og flytter hjem til Danmark til september for at fortsætte i Evangelisk Børnemission i Danmark. Lad mig prøve at forklare…
Igennem længere tid har jeg ikke rigtig været glad for mit job her i Schweiz. Jeg havde imidlertid meget svært ved at indrømme det overfor mig selv, da det jo var et „drømmejob“ og alting egentlig gik supergodt. Men engang imellem sneg tanken sig ind: „Alle er glade for at jeg varetager dette job, undtagen mig.“ Jeg skyndte mig altid at smide tanken væk og sagde til mig selv, at jeg jo ikke behøvede at blive for evigt men kunne tage en årrække mere, indtil jeg havde opnået de resultater, jeg drømte om. Jeg har også været meget glad for Schweiz og for de mennesker, jeg har lært at kende, og jeg synes, at det var en spændende proces at falde til i et nyt land og komme til at elske det.
I januar skete der nogle svære ting, som satte en masse tanker i gang – også tanker i forhold til, om jeg virkelig passede ind her. I starten lukkede jeg af for disse tanker. Jeg havde travlt med at forberede IOT-kursus og sagde til Gud: „Jeg har virkelig ikke tid til at bearbejde alt det her. Der ligger et meget vigtigt kursus, der skal forberedes.“ Til det svarede Gud prompte: „Du er også vigtig.“
Hen ad vejen blev det mere og mere klart for mig, at jeg var nødt til at give tid til disse tanker og til at mærke efter helt dybest inderst inde. Det blev en lang og smertefuld proces. Det var blandt andet svært for mig, fordi jeg følte mig lidt på zig-zag-kurs: „Først tager jeg til Schweiz, og så ønsker jeg at komme hjem igen. Hvad sker der lige med mig???“
Jeg har naturligvis bedt meget i denne tid og talt med flere vigtige personer i mit liv såsom min familie, min præst, mentor og venner. Jeg har også haft flere samtaler med vores europæiske leder af Evangelisk Børnemission. Langsomt begyndte Gud at vise mig, at jeg ikke passer ind på Kilchzimmer, og at det er OK. Ud fra en snak om nådegaver og tjenester, kom jeg frem til en meget vigtig konklusion i mit liv. Jeg har altid troet, at min tjeneste så sådan ud:
Men nu indser jeg, at min hovedgave og tjeneste er evangelisation og at andre talenter må underordne sig denne gave:
Dette betyder ikke, at jeg kun skal evangelisere. Som jeg ser det, betyder det, at jeg skal bruge min gave til evangelisation til at inspirere og træne andre til at evangelisere, og til det får jeg brug for både at undervise, administrere og lede. I mit nuværende job bruger jeg mest min tid på administration og en smule undervisning, og selv om det endelige mål med dette job jo også er evangelisation, så er jeg på ingen måde selv involveret, og det tror jeg er forkert for mig. For mig hænger evangelisation og discipelskab af nye ledere tæt sammen – som vi for eksempel praktiserer det i Teens To Children eller på børnelejr. Uden selv at være med, hvor det sker, dør jeg langsomt indvendigt af kedsomhed.
Nu er jeg taknemmelig over de ting, der skete i januar, for ellers ville jeg nok først være kommet frem til dette resultat om nogle år.
Jeg synes, at det er lidt pinligt, at jeg ikke har indset dette om mig selv før, men hvorom alting er, så er jeg stadig rigtig glad for, at jeg har haft to år i Schweiz. Jeg har lært meget om ledelse, om mennesker og om mig selv. Jeg har også fået mulighed for at være med til at påvirke nogle vigtige beslutninger og nogle forskellige mennesker i forhold til deres liv og tjeneste, så jeg føler slet ikke, at tiden har været spildt.
Det har været svært at orientere medarbejderne i min afdeling om, at jeg forlader dem. På trods af, at vi er meget forskellige (kultur, alder, kirkebaggrund, personlighed, omgangsformer) har vi virkelig haft et godt team med stor respekt og kærlighed til hinanden og et fælles værdigrundlag. De har heldigvis virkelig bakket mig op i min beslutning med stor kærlighed til mig.
Det bliver også helt klart en stor sorg at sige farvel til alle de kære kollegaer hernede, som jeg er kommet til at holde meget af. Heldigvis er der stadig brug for, at jeg kommer forbi Kilchzimmer et par gange om året for at undervise (om evangelisation J), så det er jeg rigtig glad for.
Men hvad så med fremtiden? Lige nu er jeg virkelig udkørt og har svært ved at tænke helt klart i forhold til fremtiden, men det kommer nok. EB's landskomite og jeg har nogle forskellige tanker, så det skriver jeg nok mere om senere.
Som sagt flytter jeg til Danmark 1. september. Jeg regner med at holde to ugers ferie i Danmark i starten af august, hvor jeg kan sætte min lejlighed i København i stand. Den har været lejet ud de sidste to år.
Tak fordi du tog dig tid til at læse denne lange blogpost. Jeg håber, at jeg også fremover vil have din opbakning til min tjeneste. Den har altid været uvurderlig for mig, og det vil den også være fremover!
This newsletter will probably come as a surprise to most; I have decided to resign from my present position at Kilchzimmer and return to Denmark in September and continue in CEF there. Let me try and explain...
For a good while now, I haven’t been completely happy working here in Kilchzimmer. However, as it was a ‘dream job’ and everything was going well, it took a while for me to admit to myself how I felt. But every so often, the thought crept into my head; „Everyone seems happy about what I am doing except me“. I always quickly chased the thought away and reasoned with myself that I didn’t have to stay forever, but just some years until I’d achieved the goals I wanted to achieve. I’ve also been happy here in Switzerland and with the people I’ve met and gotten to know. In addition I also feel it’s been exciting getting used to a new country and have come to love it here.
In January there were some difficulties that started a whole new train of thought, including thoughts as to whether I really fitted here. At first I blocked these thoughts out. I was busy preparing the IOT course and told God; „I really don’t have time to deal with all this right now. This important course needs preparing.“ God answered promptly; „You are also important.“
As time went on, I began to realise I needed to address these thoughts and my deepest feelings. It was a long and difficult process, not helped by feeling I was on a zigzag course: „First off to Switzerland and then wanting to come home again. What am I doing?“
I have of course prayed a great deal during this time and talked with several important people in my life including my family, pastor, mentor and CEF’s European leader, Roy Harrison. Slowly God has shown me the way. After a chat with a friend about spiritual gifts and ministries, I reached a very important conclusion in my life. I had always believed that my ministry looked like the picture above in the Danish text (the words mean Evangelism, teaching, administration and leadership)
But now I’ve come to see that my primary gift is evangelism and the other points must support this gift (see second picture).
This doesn’t mean I will only do the work of evangelism. As far as I can see, I am to use my gift to inspire and train others to evangelise and this is where I will need the ministries of teaching, administration and leading. At present I spend most time on administration and a little teaching, and even though the goal is evangelism, I am not myself involved in it and for me this is wrong. The discipling of new leaders and evangelism are for me closely conjoined, for example, as I have previously practised them in Teens to Children, or on a children’s camp. Not being out in the field is very hard for me and I am slowly dying inside from the lack of involvement.
I am still happy and grateful for my two years in Switzerland. I’ve learnt a lot about leadership, about people and about myself. I have also been part of different very interesting decisions and I know I have helped some people in relationship to their lives and ministry, so I don’t at all feel that the time has been wasted.
It’s been hard telling the Education team at Kilchzimmer that I’ll be leaving. In spite of the differences in culture, age, church background, personality etc, we have formed a nice team with common values built on mutual respect and love. They have shown great love towards me in the way they have backed me up in my decision. It will obviously be hard when the time comes to say goodbye to all my colleagues here who have come to mean so much to me. Thankfully, I will still visit Kilchzimmer a few times each year to teach which I’m very happy about.
And what of the future? At the moment I’m worn out and it’s a little difficult to think clearly about future plans. The Danish national Committee of CEF and I have some thoughts about which I’ll write more fully in the next newsletter.
Thank you for taking the time to read this unexpected blogpost. I have always appreciated your interest in my ministry, and your part in my ministry has been invaluable to me! I am looking forward to telling you more about my future in a few months’ time.
Igennem længere tid har jeg ikke rigtig været glad for mit job her i Schweiz. Jeg havde imidlertid meget svært ved at indrømme det overfor mig selv, da det jo var et „drømmejob“ og alting egentlig gik supergodt. Men engang imellem sneg tanken sig ind: „Alle er glade for at jeg varetager dette job, undtagen mig.“ Jeg skyndte mig altid at smide tanken væk og sagde til mig selv, at jeg jo ikke behøvede at blive for evigt men kunne tage en årrække mere, indtil jeg havde opnået de resultater, jeg drømte om. Jeg har også været meget glad for Schweiz og for de mennesker, jeg har lært at kende, og jeg synes, at det var en spændende proces at falde til i et nyt land og komme til at elske det.
I januar skete der nogle svære ting, som satte en masse tanker i gang – også tanker i forhold til, om jeg virkelig passede ind her. I starten lukkede jeg af for disse tanker. Jeg havde travlt med at forberede IOT-kursus og sagde til Gud: „Jeg har virkelig ikke tid til at bearbejde alt det her. Der ligger et meget vigtigt kursus, der skal forberedes.“ Til det svarede Gud prompte: „Du er også vigtig.“
Hen ad vejen blev det mere og mere klart for mig, at jeg var nødt til at give tid til disse tanker og til at mærke efter helt dybest inderst inde. Det blev en lang og smertefuld proces. Det var blandt andet svært for mig, fordi jeg følte mig lidt på zig-zag-kurs: „Først tager jeg til Schweiz, og så ønsker jeg at komme hjem igen. Hvad sker der lige med mig???“
Jeg har naturligvis bedt meget i denne tid og talt med flere vigtige personer i mit liv såsom min familie, min præst, mentor og venner. Jeg har også haft flere samtaler med vores europæiske leder af Evangelisk Børnemission. Langsomt begyndte Gud at vise mig, at jeg ikke passer ind på Kilchzimmer, og at det er OK. Ud fra en snak om nådegaver og tjenester, kom jeg frem til en meget vigtig konklusion i mit liv. Jeg har altid troet, at min tjeneste så sådan ud:
Men nu indser jeg, at min hovedgave og tjeneste er evangelisation og at andre talenter må underordne sig denne gave:
Dette betyder ikke, at jeg kun skal evangelisere. Som jeg ser det, betyder det, at jeg skal bruge min gave til evangelisation til at inspirere og træne andre til at evangelisere, og til det får jeg brug for både at undervise, administrere og lede. I mit nuværende job bruger jeg mest min tid på administration og en smule undervisning, og selv om det endelige mål med dette job jo også er evangelisation, så er jeg på ingen måde selv involveret, og det tror jeg er forkert for mig. For mig hænger evangelisation og discipelskab af nye ledere tæt sammen – som vi for eksempel praktiserer det i Teens To Children eller på børnelejr. Uden selv at være med, hvor det sker, dør jeg langsomt indvendigt af kedsomhed.
Nu er jeg taknemmelig over de ting, der skete i januar, for ellers ville jeg nok først være kommet frem til dette resultat om nogle år.
Jeg synes, at det er lidt pinligt, at jeg ikke har indset dette om mig selv før, men hvorom alting er, så er jeg stadig rigtig glad for, at jeg har haft to år i Schweiz. Jeg har lært meget om ledelse, om mennesker og om mig selv. Jeg har også fået mulighed for at være med til at påvirke nogle vigtige beslutninger og nogle forskellige mennesker i forhold til deres liv og tjeneste, så jeg føler slet ikke, at tiden har været spildt.
Det har været svært at orientere medarbejderne i min afdeling om, at jeg forlader dem. På trods af, at vi er meget forskellige (kultur, alder, kirkebaggrund, personlighed, omgangsformer) har vi virkelig haft et godt team med stor respekt og kærlighed til hinanden og et fælles værdigrundlag. De har heldigvis virkelig bakket mig op i min beslutning med stor kærlighed til mig.
Det bliver også helt klart en stor sorg at sige farvel til alle de kære kollegaer hernede, som jeg er kommet til at holde meget af. Heldigvis er der stadig brug for, at jeg kommer forbi Kilchzimmer et par gange om året for at undervise (om evangelisation J), så det er jeg rigtig glad for.
Men hvad så med fremtiden? Lige nu er jeg virkelig udkørt og har svært ved at tænke helt klart i forhold til fremtiden, men det kommer nok. EB's landskomite og jeg har nogle forskellige tanker, så det skriver jeg nok mere om senere.
Som sagt flytter jeg til Danmark 1. september. Jeg regner med at holde to ugers ferie i Danmark i starten af august, hvor jeg kan sætte min lejlighed i København i stand. Den har været lejet ud de sidste to år.
Tak fordi du tog dig tid til at læse denne lange blogpost. Jeg håber, at jeg også fremover vil have din opbakning til min tjeneste. Den har altid været uvurderlig for mig, og det vil den også være fremover!
This newsletter will probably come as a surprise to most; I have decided to resign from my present position at Kilchzimmer and return to Denmark in September and continue in CEF there. Let me try and explain...
For a good while now, I haven’t been completely happy working here in Kilchzimmer. However, as it was a ‘dream job’ and everything was going well, it took a while for me to admit to myself how I felt. But every so often, the thought crept into my head; „Everyone seems happy about what I am doing except me“. I always quickly chased the thought away and reasoned with myself that I didn’t have to stay forever, but just some years until I’d achieved the goals I wanted to achieve. I’ve also been happy here in Switzerland and with the people I’ve met and gotten to know. In addition I also feel it’s been exciting getting used to a new country and have come to love it here.
In January there were some difficulties that started a whole new train of thought, including thoughts as to whether I really fitted here. At first I blocked these thoughts out. I was busy preparing the IOT course and told God; „I really don’t have time to deal with all this right now. This important course needs preparing.“ God answered promptly; „You are also important.“
As time went on, I began to realise I needed to address these thoughts and my deepest feelings. It was a long and difficult process, not helped by feeling I was on a zigzag course: „First off to Switzerland and then wanting to come home again. What am I doing?“
I have of course prayed a great deal during this time and talked with several important people in my life including my family, pastor, mentor and CEF’s European leader, Roy Harrison. Slowly God has shown me the way. After a chat with a friend about spiritual gifts and ministries, I reached a very important conclusion in my life. I had always believed that my ministry looked like the picture above in the Danish text (the words mean Evangelism, teaching, administration and leadership)
But now I’ve come to see that my primary gift is evangelism and the other points must support this gift (see second picture).
This doesn’t mean I will only do the work of evangelism. As far as I can see, I am to use my gift to inspire and train others to evangelise and this is where I will need the ministries of teaching, administration and leading. At present I spend most time on administration and a little teaching, and even though the goal is evangelism, I am not myself involved in it and for me this is wrong. The discipling of new leaders and evangelism are for me closely conjoined, for example, as I have previously practised them in Teens to Children, or on a children’s camp. Not being out in the field is very hard for me and I am slowly dying inside from the lack of involvement.
I am still happy and grateful for my two years in Switzerland. I’ve learnt a lot about leadership, about people and about myself. I have also been part of different very interesting decisions and I know I have helped some people in relationship to their lives and ministry, so I don’t at all feel that the time has been wasted.
It’s been hard telling the Education team at Kilchzimmer that I’ll be leaving. In spite of the differences in culture, age, church background, personality etc, we have formed a nice team with common values built on mutual respect and love. They have shown great love towards me in the way they have backed me up in my decision. It will obviously be hard when the time comes to say goodbye to all my colleagues here who have come to mean so much to me. Thankfully, I will still visit Kilchzimmer a few times each year to teach which I’m very happy about.
And what of the future? At the moment I’m worn out and it’s a little difficult to think clearly about future plans. The Danish national Committee of CEF and I have some thoughts about which I’ll write more fully in the next newsletter.
Thank you for taking the time to read this unexpected blogpost. I have always appreciated your interest in my ministry, and your part in my ministry has been invaluable to me! I am looking forward to telling you more about my future in a few months’ time.
lørdag, maj 02, 2009
Italien - Italy
Jeg har altid drømt om at komme til Italien men aldrig fået gjort noget ved det. Men nu bor jeg jo lige midt i Europas hjerte, så det måtte udnyttes, og sidste fredag satte jeg mig derfor ind i min lille kære bil og sussede ned til Italien. Inden havde jeg fået serveret et par historier om, hvordan folk kører i Italien, så det var lidt med frygt og bæven, at jeg tog afsted. Men det gjaldt bare om at finde sin indre italiener frem og se det fra den lyse side: Trafikreglerne blev kun brudt, når det gav mening, således at vi alle kom frem hurtigere og i meget bedre humør.
Jeg ankom til fantastisk sommervejr helt nede ved Middelhavet men nåede kun at tage ét billede førend Italien begyndte at skære tænder og sende kaskader af regn og vind ned over os. Men men.. Italien er da fantastisk allivel - om ikke andet kan man jo altid sætte sig ind på en cafe of få noget god Tiramisu!
I have always dreamed of going to Italy but it has never come to pass. But now that I am living at the very heart of Europe, it had to be exploited; and last Friday I jumped into my dear little car and drow down to Italy. Before leaving, I heard a couple of stories about how people are driving in Italy, so it was a bit of fright that I left. But I actually enjoyed driving in Italy because I realised that the traffic rules were only broken when it made sense, so that we all could arrive quickly at our destinations.
I arrived in wonderful summer weather by the Mediterranean but only had time to take one picture before Italy began to gnash and send cascades of rain and wind down over us. But but .. Italy is fantastic allivel - and if nothing else is possible, you can always sit in a cafe and eat some good tiramisu!
dkjfdlkfjkldhgklsd - dkjfdlkfjkldhgklsd
Det har været en rigtig dejlig afslappende forlænget weekend. Jeg har helt glemt at forberede mig på min næste test på bibelskolen på onsdag (Paulus' anden missionsrejse), men håber, at det hele går alligevel.
Her er et udsnit af, hvad jeg har lavet:
Hygge med Ute (kollega fra Tyskland)
Videoaften på storskærm med alle, der bor i huset for tiden
Morgenmad på Mövenpick (Tak, R&R)
Gåtur med Kristina
og en hel del lure i ny og næ
Og så i morgen: Kirke og koncert med Trudy
Lige hvad jeg havde brug for!!! Den rette kombination af aktivitet og afslapning.
It has been a really relaxing weekend. It has been so good that I totally forgot to prepare for our next test on Wednesday at the Bible school... (Paul's second missionary journey) Hope, everything goes fine anyway...
Here is a short review of what I have been doing:
Nice chats with Ute (a colleague from Germany)
Movie night on a big screen with everyone that is living in this house at the moment
Breakfast at Mövenpick (thanks, R&R)
Walking with Kristina
And lots of naps here and there
Tomorrow will be church time and time to go for a concert with Trudy
Just exactly what I needed this weekend. The perfect combination of activities and time to take it easy.
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